Monday, October 4, 2010

Finally have the internet back again!!!

So sorry about the delay in writing but my internet was playing up and when I went over to the library to update for some reason they had blocked blogger.com. But X has given me a PAYG internet dongle with £500 loaded so that should keep me going for a bit.

Ok so X well I have been on a date with him since I last wrote and a lot of our issues were resolved especially over what he did for us to break up. I told him how I felt and to be fair the man held his hands up, and said I fucked up, and was trying to act like the big man! Are we back together no, do I get an allowance from him no, but I have told him I will think about it, with some rules in place.

I wont move back to London - I got too wrapped up in his world, and with my grandfather dying in July its made me realise I dont want to, nor can i be away from my family at the moment!

It wont be a case of me dropping everything for him -  I have built up a new life for myself again and wont be running to him on his demand.

As before there are to be no others - of course there is still the wife, but if I was to hear about another SB we would be done.

And finally the money I gave back to him, when our relationship ended I want back this may seem weird but I gave that back in anger and this time I wouldnt be doing something as dumb as that!

And he has agreed to those points and put some off his own in, but his I will keep to myself, as they are more personal to him and people who knew him or his circle would know who I was talking about.

But still something holds me back back I have told him I will give him a decision by the end of the month. But in the mean time he has sent me another present a lovely pair of Louboutins will add a picture for you they are just a standard pair but they will help me when I am going on my job interviews, yes that will also be something thats different I will be working I will not depend on a man  again and to be honest I think I would be bored going back completly to my old life but we will se what happens.

Love

Jess
xoxox